July 31, 2024

Hello! I have a much more positive entry this time! My birthday was July 28th, so I’m 21 now! The manager of the gas station was kind enough to cover the store for Tish and I so she could take me to her favorite bar in the next town over. The bar had a great atmosphere. There was a live band playing rock music and people dancing and just having a good time. We got really lucky and there was some sort of bottomless margarita promotion going on the night that we were there. I drank a lot. Probably more than I should have for my first time, but Tish decided to stay sober enough to make sure I had a good safe time. I love her.

In other news, I met a boy named Ellis at the bar. He was a tall, skinny, nerdy looking guy. Nerdy in a good way if that makes sense. Tish and I were dancing to a cover of Misery Business that the band was playing, and he came over and asked for my number. I was a bit shocked at first, because I’d never been approached by a boy before. Of course, up to this point I hadn’t made a habit of going out anywhere.

He offered to buy Tish and I a drink and we went and sat at the bar with him and talked for a while. I learned he works as a dental assistant in the town the bar is in. We both are fans of anime, so we talked about the show One Piece for a while. He had such a sweet smile and these deep, warm brown eyes that just melted me. I told him I was trans, as that’s been a big deal breaker when I’ve had feelings for boys in the past, and he just said, “Oh that’s cool.” Like it wasn’t a big deal at all. I’ve texted him a lot over the last few days. He sends me a good morning message every morning. Every time I get a message from him, I feel giddy, like a kid waking up Christmas morning and seeing gifts under the tree. I think I like him a lot. He makes me feel seen. He treats me like a lady. He’s so warm and kind and respectful. Mayhap I’ve found more peanut butter. 

I can’t help but smile as I sit here and write this. I hear the Frogs in the woods singing their song once again and I am hopeful. I hadn’t really even considered trying to date anyone over the last couple of years. I tried dating apps after high school, and it never really worked out. Out here in the sticks, usually when they learned I was trans they would disappear on me. And now, out of the blue, here comes a boy who so far has treated me like a queen. 

I hope next month's journal entry brings more good news. Thanks for always being there, friend. 

-Hope